I trust my husband to care for me with concern, gentleness,
roughness, heart and soul, in the most intimate of ways. But it wasn’t always that way; let me
explain.
In my professional life, I was known as a ball buster, a
powerhouse, a dynamic woman. Yet, in the
bedroom I enjoyed being alluring, like wearing sexy lingerie. With this man, though, these outfits seemed
to bring out the beast in him. I asked
myself, what was happening here?
Early in our relationship my husband made it clear how much he
enjoyed bondage sex. One night, he even spontaneously
tied my wrists, using my own belt - and I found it incredibly thrilling…! But then I was shocked, even offended, by photos
he showed me of women in bondage scenes, scenes that he wanted to enact with
me. My reactions made him reluctant to
broach the subject, although he did, and we’ve continued to discuss the idea of
bondage sex over the 27 years we’ve been together. In the beginning, for a special occasion, I
was sometimes even okay with having my wrists bound with a scarf, because I
truly wanted to be the star of his show and fulfill his desires, uncomfortable as
it might be for me. It wasn't easy; I was
frightened that he intended to immobilize me, or gag me, or “punish me” (for
what…?). My mind raced with thoughts of
Salem witch burnings and rapes, and I just couldn’t wrap my head around the
idea that this wonderful, clever, sensitive and creative man would want to tie
me up. Admittedly, though, despite my
reluctance to surrender, I found that being tied up was kind of thrilling,
although I would say it was mostly because of how much he enjoyed it. When I yielded a bit, we even went to a sex
shop together, where we bought leather cuffs, a whip, and a riding crop. We continued to have the occasional bondage
night; for his benefit only, of course.
Until recently.
Deeply surrendering to bondage requires supreme trust in your
partner, and surrendering to love allows for building that trust. My husband would always say, “Let me tie you
this way or that, and I promise it will heighten your pleasure”…and it most
always did…! And yet, I wouldn’t fully
surrender to the overwhelming pleasures that he’d crafted for me. I’m a lover of love, and as I embraced
surrendering to my love for my husband, I began trusting him and his bondage
fantasies. He says, “Trust me and I’ll
continue transporting you to new, heaven-on-earth, mind-blowing experiences of
sexuality and sensuality; now allow me to restrain you this way…”, and he has delivered
on that promise, many, many times over…! As I began to trust him – to choose love over
fear - I could see that the more fully I surrendered to him, the greater the reward,
in the deepening of our love, reaching new levels of richness. And so, after years of saying no, I finally
said, “YES, DO ME…! I’ll try anything, do
me any way your heart desires…!“ This is
a major shift for me, much to his delight.
We work from adjacent offices, co-creating different projects
together, and while I might be the boss there, in the bedroom my husband
rules…! Most times, he gathers an array of goodies to
support my writhing in pursuit of the most bombastic screaming climax to date;
he’ll unwind the bed straps, and lay out a blindfold, more rope, and maybe a
vibrator. And the sex toy cabinet is
right next to the bed in case he needs anything else. Of course, we still have “vanilla” sex
sometimes, although lately that’s reserved mostly for quickies, because when there’s
time, our bondage sex is so incredibly hotter.
I turned 65 this year and my body is fuller, and not supple and
flexible, like it was when we first met, yet my husband loves every curve,
every crevice, and every inch of me.
Especially now, because with my new-found freedom in the delicious
pursuit of pleasure, I’m willing to be bound in new positions, add a vibrator,
or be gagged and spanked – and he knows I’ll love every minute! We’ve even made our bed a bondage heaven by
adding restraint straps and cuffs, which are hidden, but ready at a spontaneous
moment’s notice; it’s always titillating, just knowing they’re right there!
Recently, I’ve had some pain in my legs and shoulders. To my
surprise, yesterday I thought, “Hmmm, surrendering to pleasure…what a perfect
way to forget this pain…sexual healing.
Wonder what he’ll have in store for me today if I really let go…?” So I
put on our favorite tomato-red, open-crotch, fishnet body stocking, and a matching
thong, and called his name. Sure enough,
he took one look and said, “Come with me, I have to have you right now…”. “You never have to ask me twice…”, I said, and
as we headed for the bedroom, I could tell by his look that I was in for some
top-rated pleasure!
I know his commitment is to take me to a new threshold of pleasure
each time he creates one of his bondage masterpieces - with me as the
centerfold - and this time was special; I felt so available, so much more willing
and ready to surrender and submit to his suggestions. He took his time restraining me, he used a
vibrator on me, he lingered, he ceased, he teased me, and my body responded
with ease, yummy sounds and delicious movements. I was a fine orchestra and he was the
conductor who knew just how to play me. Over
and over again, I kept surrendering to pleasure, and finally, the waves of my
climax exceeded anything I’d ever felt before and I went on…and on…and on, in throbbing
ecstasy. Thunderous. And then…he clipped both my wrist cuffs to one
of the bed straps, and turned me on my side…
Those pains I’d been feeling?
Gone! I’d surrendered to love, to
my husband, and to sexy bondage, and it was very, very good. I’m trading the vanilla status quo for the
wild, wild west!
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